Feeling reconnected, rejuvenated, and lost...

Each summer we try to visit Vermont.  It's where I grew up and where my side of the family resides.  There's just something about seeing those mountains, smelling the air, and dirt roads that makes me feel at home.  Peaceful.  Rejuvenated.

I come home feeling inspired to be outside on my .25 acre lot.  I weed.  I mow.  I cultivate.  I investigate composting and getting a worm farm.  I feel refreshed and closer to nature.  I guess visiting the country, having a bear sighting, and getting away from suburbia will do that to a girl.

This particularly trip was also extremely relaxing.  Due to a number of factors, we were able to spend more time with family than any previous year.  I reconnected with cousins and other relatives.  Our time together was filled with laughter and conversations around the fire pit, enjoying the small town's 4th of July festivities, and delicious BBQs.

Sadly I return home and feel lost.  While the reconnections and rejuvenation are still within, there's a sense of loss that all that I experienced in the 3 weeks during my visit - could be something I experienced year round if I lived closer.

So what does that mean?  It means I have to work through this feeling of loss and realize how fortunate we are to have shared those three weeks with those we love.  I have to cherish the fact that my daughters were able to experience three weeks of Vermont life and Vermont souls.  I have to remind myself what's there and it's within reach if I hop on a plane, open FaceTime, or get back in the car for another 17 hours.

Don't misinterpret my message.  I appreciate my life, family, and friends here in Illinois.  I am incredibly grateful that my husband's side of the family is willing to do anything for us in a moment's notice.  I am happy as a teacher in the school I've been at for the last 11 years.  I love my house on Wineberry Lane and my neighbors.

I'm just reminded that staying connected and rejuvenated takes time and effort.  With that being said, I'm off to write a few notes to those Vermont souls.  After that I may even read some more articles on worm farming in Mother Earth News.

Sarah